Lets face it.
We're all weak.
Weak, weaklings. And its not out fault, simply because I believe we were born this way. I believe we were meant to be born weak. Look at baby us. We're so gosh-darn-cute. Not only that, we're also so gosh-darn-helpless. That actually constitutes most of the reason why babies are so cute. We were meant to be that way. Cute, helpless. Weak.
And we can't stay that way forever. Its a cold, cruel, scary, treacherous, and plain RIDICULOUS world out there. We can't be covered in our cute, cuddly, protected insides forever. Because sooner or later, the Big bad Wolf outside will huff and puff. And by then, if we haven't gotten the hang out bulding brick houses, or learning karate chops, or just plain common sense...well....lets just say the wolf is called the “Big Bad” wolf for a reason.
I guess at some level we all have comfort zones. I know I do. I also know I'm just plain lazy to walk out of mine and into the fire. And you know my biggest enemy? Reason coupled with excuses. Meaning...excuses start sounding reasonable. And then I never walk. I never learn. And basically, god help me when I hear huffing and Puffing.
A lot of things can wake you up to the wheezing outside. College nearly constitues #1 on my list. I learnt a lot otherwise, but nothing really opened my eyes with clothesline clips like college did. Its still happening. My eyes are being opened everyday. I guess I have five kinds of people I have to thank for that...
#1- My friends.
They've separated the good, the bad and the ugly for me.
Either by example, or by explanation.
For that, I owe them.
#2- People I don't know but have heard about.
Nothing spreads as well (and tastes as delicious) as gossip.
And if that gossip is “That person is absolutely awesome”...you know that some people are
doing some things very, very right.
#3- People I don't know and have heard about..in err..a not so good way.
Nothing bites like a bad impression.
And nothing's harder than trying to change one.
Surprise, surprise! Who would've thunk! Anyone who's in the same college as me would be plain shocked to read this, but the college atmosphere simply forces you to grow up, think on your own terms and manage your life. Simply because no teacher is going to do that for you. So i guess their strategy, as much as we detest it all, works.
School was awesome, but It didn't get me to attempt doing any of those things.
Simply for actually being positive enough to look at the whole thing as a learning experience, when disatrous events also come to mind.
So anyway....About school will probably be a different post, but College turned out to be a whole more than I expected, and bargained for. Its a whole new life of mine...one that I like..and I like the fact that its mine, my own...and not necessarily carried over from school. It used to be that way, but now it has become its own entity, and I like that. I like the distinction.
At some level, I feel Like I'm finally, truly, growing up. (A LOT of people may disagree. Ha!)
I feel like I'm learning to become stronger, even with all the ridiculous constraints that college imposes. Its like a tube all around me, and I'm forced to grow over-all in spite of it and come out through the other end. Like rising through a straw. And as much as I hate it, Love it, or am sick of it...I need it.
p.s- I AM AWED.
I CANNOT BELIEVE I ADMITTED THAT.
And In spite of it all, the college bitching will continue!