Friday, November 27, 2009

Bigger Belief

Irrational Belief can be a strange thing. I was first exposed to it in college, no, wait, first exposed to it when I was an infant, when I started believing in god. Why? Because mummy and daddy believe in god. Parents fold their children's hands in prayer, tell them to close their eyes, tell them to pray. Why? Because children don't know any better? Because that's the best way? Because that's the easiest way?
or because that's the accepted way?

Either way, that was my first irrational belief. No proof, no questions asked. God was everywhere, almighty, powerful. God was perennial Indian Santa- he always knew if you were good or bad. God, in that way was he and she, child and adult, good and bad karma- all rolled into one magnificent mural of wonderment and power. God was synonymous with destiny and fate. Praying to him was like praying to yourself, asking for you to find the strength to do the things you wanted to do, and let's face it, it's easier, at that age, to ask someone else for things than yourself. Right? Right.

This went on for a while, until life made me refine that belief. I don't believe in idol-worship, I think organized religion tends to lose its purpose, I don't believe that there is just one way to pray or one place to pray. I know I've prayed my lungs out in bathrooms, bed, at window sills and a LOT in moving vehicles. I hope when I climb stairs. I dream when I walk.
I wish when I sit. It's all the time. I wouldn't exist if I didn't believe that good things have a place in our lives.

But after college, I've started to believe in irrational belief not just because I'm used to it, but because I've actually seen it work. I've to thank a lot of people for this, but for all her never-say-die category effort, this is because of you, Silverstreak. There have been times when I've irrationally believed something to be possible. With absolutely no pointers, not even a breeze blowing in that direction.

When every little thing tells me it's the other thing, I've believed because I've wanted it. Truly, truly wanted it. And I've got it, too. How, you ask? hey, if I knew, I wouldn't just be writing a blog post, I'd be writing a book.

So yes, contrary to my previous ranting posts, I'm not stopping. Not now, anyway.

Everything happens for a reason, people say. Well, I've reasons to believe that everything happens. It has to. Not because of what I've done to deserve it, but because of the belief in what I will do, once I get it.


Silverstreak said...

Ah the happy time. Desperately wanting to go back to that simple life.

Thanks! :)

DA said... i'd long to go back to the times of irrational belief. Whoever said ignorance is bliss sure got it right, huh?

But irrational beliefs are just that...irrational...! We pray all we want, wish upon shooting stars, hope against hope that we get what we want. But what does all this praying and wishing indicate? It shows our intent, our desire to get what we want. And if our desire IS that strong, wouldn't you suppose that our personal efforts in them are just proportionally that much more? And then, wouldn't it be just as well logical enough to conclude that if our efforts are indeed more (even though we do not realize it) , the chances of it succeeding too are above average? And yet, when it does happen, we look up and say "thank you God for granting us our wish..."
we've truly been dumbed down by society haven't we...pffft...!

But I guess we are weak by nature, we NEED to have that security blanket around us where we can place our faith and fate in the hands of with all its interim periods of pain and failures just seems easier that way when we can look back inside ourselves and console our pathetic little hearts, "Don't you cry now little one...there was nothing more you could've was just not in our hands anymore".

Its an incredible duality we put on we purport to show incredible strength in times of need, and yet cower under our sheets at the first sign of a thunderstorm...

But who cares right?

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