The Life Excuse

We've all heard it, in some form. "Life is short". This, dear readers, is the perfect excuse to do a lot of things, ranging from Bungee jumping and dating to doing a course in animation or bar-tending. Life is short. It's a perfectly valid excuse to really live it, and it goes beyond being an excuse- it becomes a reason. We should all walk on ice, flirt with danger, fight fire with fire atleast once in our lives. Just to know what it feels like, or why we shouldn't. Living is about the experience.

A website I happened to read about in last week's TIME magazine seems to have taken the Life Excuse a bit too far, in my opinion. I'm talking about the Ashley Madison Agency, that was established in 2001, with the sole purpose of allowing people to have and enjoy affairs the way they were meant to be- secret. "Life is short. Have an affair", they say. They seem to have some sort of guarantee on this- especially since the applications are loaded on phone browsers that leave no trace of anything. It is also supposedly the most successful site capitalizing on extra-marital affairs, according to the article in TIME magazine. Read it, here.

Presenting, Mr. Hypocrite of the month (and extendible to MUCH longer), CEO Noel Biderman. Here's an excerpt from TIME magazine - "Humans aren't meant to be monogamous," he says. So would this free-thinking CEO mind if his own wife used his site? "I would be devastated," he says.


I'd love to know what Ashley Madison users think of THAT! While Biderman is (supposedly) happily married, the rest of you lead wretched lives filled with lying, suspicion and (hopefully) guilt. I'm sure the thrills and frills of your affairs are oh-so-fabulous, and there's no discounting that. But, life is short, have an affair? Really? Then why are you married, Biderman, and why would you be devastated if your wife had an affair? Doesn't the same logic apply to her too?

No, because you're a pathetic, infinite curse-worthy hypocrite who wants to live the win-lose situation. Everyone else will lose, because, let's face it, either they'll caught some other way or the guilt and the lying will give them away. Electronic tracing isn't the only way to find out if someone's having an affair. There are a lot more signs- and getting caught isn't all that impossible. So while you sit back with your wife and relax in the knowledge that you live in security, you're acting like some sick pervert prophet who just wants to see society fall apart in front of you. If human beings aren't meant to be monogamous, as you claim, why are you an exception? I know they aren't, but human beings cannot be used as walking-talking-living toys for your ventures either. Clearly, that statement is something you learnt up from some footnote or book summary as an attempt to justify your lousy way of living.

There's a great example of a creep who is using other people's desire to make his own money. He doesn't care if you're life seems short, long, fun or dull. He wants to make his cold, hard cash, and people are falling prey to his pathetic lure. You want to have an affair, fine, it's your life, but don't let this waste of skin profit from that financially. How do you know he doesn't read your messages from his servers? How do you know he doesn't have a profile on his own web-site? If his services really do make an affair hard to trace, how do we know that both him AND his wife aren't cheating on each other? I hope all these are untrue, but you may never know. After reading this article, I really can't expect much better from people. Can you?

And yes, if only I was even marginally better at coding, Mr Biderman, I'd write applications to trace your servers and locate your profile and others' messages and MAKE SURE that those messages are sent directly to every spouse's inbox. Not because of the havoc it will cause those people, but because of the havoc it will cause YOU. I cannot bear to see you succeed in the trail of other people's desires that you encourage in the first place, while being the biggest hypocrite of all time. Atleast live the affair-filled life you're preaching; then I might have a pinch of regard for your honesty.

Really, I'd love to use my brains and my degree to bring you down.
Heck, maybe I will.